50 days

50 days left and we're 31 weeks along. That's very good. All of this is progress in the right direction. My hospital that I would prefer to deliver at is equipped to handle births after 32 weeks (provided there are no serious complications), so if I can just last a few more days, I won't have too much of a worry of having to head over to Peoria to deliver to be near the NICU at Children's Hospital. That will be a huge relief. Of course, 34 is better because the baby is pretty much developed, and 36 or 37 is even better because it's full term. The doctor still seems to think that 38 is within our grasp, so that's the ultimate goal. I have my regular appointment tomorrow - two weeks ago we said we would set our surgery date then. I think we'll still do that, but I'm not sure. I'll let you know.

In other news, life is starting to feel a bit more normal. It doesn't feel as weird or strange to just get up, come downstairs, and sit around all day. That's not saying I wouldn't prefer to be doing ANYTHING else (I got an email about what textbooks I wanted to use in the spring and it was the highlight of my day - made me feel like me again), but at least it's not as totally awkward as it was. Right now, I'm spending my time knitting and re-watching all of Mad Men from the beginning. My phone alarm goes off every six hours to remind me to take my medicine, and I just try to relax as much as possible. It's been a bit more lonely than I anticipated...quiet...but I suppose that helps with the relaxing.

Until last night, contractions had been minimal, but they decided to kick up again just to make life a bit more fun. About eight o'clock last night, they started to feel painful - not too much pressure, but a good deal of pain. They were also very continuous; as soon as one would stop, the next one would start. It was very unpleasant. Again, we decided to wait it out (since it was pain but little pressure, it was unlikely they were doing much of anything other than pissing me off) and a few hours later the pain decreased but the pressure increased. Since last night, my uterus has pretty much been one rock hard ball - the pressure just is unrelenting. But, again, these aren't mimicking actual contractions, they're just pressure, so unless we get both together (pressure and pain) or some actual contractions that increase in frequency or intensity, we'll just try to wait it out until the appointment tomorrow morning. It's at 9am, so it's not that far away. At this point, we seem to just sit on the monitors when this happens (which isn't a bad thing because it assures us that Jellybean is ok), but my body has that horrible tendency to stop doing things before I make it to the doctor, and then it just all feels futile. We'll just hope that JB is doing well in there and that there has been no cervical change when we go to the exam tomorrow.

So, the long and short of it is: emotionally we're adjusting and physically, my body is still being a pain in the wazoo. JB is kicking away and she is really upset that I'm making it so uncomfortable for her. Hopefully we'll have an uneventful visit to the doctor tomorrow and I'll tell you all about it afterwards.